February 26, 2012 "One year older and wiser too . . . well, working on the wiser part!"

Bonjour Bonjour!

Well this week has been a milemarker for me...ONE YEAR AS A MISSIONARY!

Yes it feels surreal. Does it feel like its gone by fast?

Absolutely

Does it feel like missionary life is all I've ever known and 'real' life feels like a lifetime ago?

Absouletly.

But its good. Missionary life is good. Actually its the best, and well if its not...I dont remember otherwise. All I remember is there was once a time in my life where I slept till noon...now that just sounds so very sinful.

En plus, this week the missionaries in our ward were asked to do a Young Mens/Young Womens activity titled "What I wish I had known before my mission"...ironic timing. So here some of little reflections...and maybe some of the lessons I've learned along the way.

A. Knowing how to speak french is overrated. Honestly, whether you speak great or not, people are either prepared for the message or not. Even if you can do fancy things like use subjunctive and have a fabulous accent...if they arent ready they aren't ready. Alors...search for the ones who think your humble speaking abilites are charming. Ask Moses...speaking well is overrated. The important thing is...just speak.

B. The Lord has a plan...and I have NO idea what that plan is. Be obediant. Have faith. Choose to be happy.
Someday you'll look back and see God's plan was there all along.

C. If you pray before every meal..the Lord will protect you when you eat fish head, mystery meat, strange tofu-fruit-soup that apparently qualifies as ice cream in the Philippines and the really cheap groceries that are available on a missionary budget.

D. Humans smell bad. Just live in a big city... you'll know what Im talking about.

E. The scriptures rock. Where else can you read about guys chopping off arms, people seeing visions, bloody carnage covering the land, people wandering in the wilderness following directions from a golden ball, and Jesus....and somehow these stories teach you what job you should take, what school you should go to, how to be patient with people, and that God loves you on bad hair days. Its like magic...or its like inspired!

F. Half the people you meet on your mission think your crazy for leaving your family, studies, and country for preaching the word of God.
The other half think your fantastic...but already believe in God and don't want to listen your message.
Then there are the chosen few who believe...and they are totally worth it.

Ok.... in reality these are funny and they don't even scratch the surface of what I've learned this past year. Mostly Im just filled for gratitude for all that I've been given this year and all I've learned. The mission really does teach you so much for life. And I still have so much time...and so much to learn!

Ok so on to what happened this week....

We have been doing lots of finding this week...and we've had some miracles. One morning we were porting, and everyone just kept slamming thier doors in our faces...and it was frustrating. And we were walking along talking about how we just want someone to just hear the name of our church and welcome us into their home. Well we knock on this door and this little boy answers and we tell him who we are and ask him if his parents are home. And said ya, and then went to get them. Well his dad came to the door and was super excited and was like "come in come in!" and invited to sit in his living room. Once we were all situated he was like "well, I dont know much about Mormon doctrine...teach me.'"
HAHA YA!!! Just what we were asking for! Literally, so this guy's name is Bruno and he is really Christian and was legitimally interested. He told us he had heard that mormons aren't Christian and basically asked for our testimonies of Christ. It was really neat. After we were done he said "well I dont know why people think you're not Christian"...and we were kind of like, ya, neither do we! It was really cool...he invited us back to his bible study group he has every couple weeks in his home so we will see how it goes...

Then another night we had gone out to the suburbs of Brussels, which is a little tricky because it is generally more dutch speaking, but its where we found Kedinnetse so I though we should give it another try. Well it was a rather unsuccessful night, and then our bus was late. So we finally get back to the metro system, and we sit down and there is a guy across from us holding his bible, but he was on the phone! So we waited, and we had to get off the metro, so we just handed him a passalong card and got off. Well not even twenty mintues later he called us! He actually called us! It was amazing...he told us he had seen men with plaques like ours...and asked if we could come over an answer some questions. So we fixed an appointment...and we went over he had his wife and three children just sitting there waiting for us! It was amazing. They are such a cool family. We are going to really start teaching them this week so I'll keep you posted.

Ah the mission is wonderful. Just when you think that all the little things you do don't matter...the Lord gives you a tender mercy and it all feels worth it again.
I love you!
Soeur Smith

February 20, 2012 "typical transfer week"

Bonjour Bonjour!

 

How was your week!?

 

I honestly don't know what I can talk about this week. TRANSFERS. That means the first half of the week consisted of saying goodbye to lots of ward members and helping Soeur Murray pack...that feels like ten years ago.

 

Then Soeur Cope arrived! Things have been great...I'm breaking her into the Strombeek-Brussels Soeurs craziness. We've been laughing non-stop. To summarize our week together: things are good.

 

There is also a blue (green) missionary in our ward...its pretty exciting! I love being around the missionaries fresh out of the MTC. And the elders had a baptism this week...not a bad way to start off his mission!

 

Soeur Tom recieved the Holy Ghost...and of course she was glowing! I love being a missionary... moments like this make it all worth it!

 

And the sun is even shining in Brussels today...and it is above zero. Don't know what else I could ask for!

 

Sorry I feel like I dont have any amazing, or crazy stories this week. Really, life is good. Missionary work is the best. And life is good. what more can I say?

 

Love you all and hope you have a great week!

Soeur Smith

 

February 13, 2012 "When it rains, it pours"

Bonjour Bonjour

 

So you know the expression 'when it rains it pours'? I realize that is usually directed towards bad luck...but this week I feel like I've had quite the storm of blessings. (sorry the exclamation mark button isnt working...probably a good thing because there would be about a million in this email...so I guess consider yourself blessed because you won't feel like Im yelling at you)

 

But seriously...this week was another miracle week. I know I should probably be used to all these miracles, since I HAVE  been a missionary for almost a year and everything...but some days I just go to bed thinking 'holy cow, what did I ever do to deserve to recieve all these blessings and be a part of all these miracles..I mean c'mon...ask my mom, I was not that great of a teenager.." but alas, the good Lord is somehow merciful enough to just keep pouring on the blessings.

 

I wish everyone could experience what it feels like for a missionary to see someone they've taught get baptized. I think I felt heaven for a few minutes this week. Honestly, a mission is a very tender experience. Your heart grows and becomes tender in ways I didn't know it could. Sometimes, I feel like such a grouch. People complain about their jobs, their children, how they wish they could quit smoking, and sometimes its all I can do from yelling at them 'WE HAVE THE ANSWERS,JUST APPLY THEM'..but then I regain my senses and kindly remind them to read the Book of Mormon, because it WILL change their lives. And then, when my most uncharitable feelings seem to be taking over, that sweet tender Holy Ghost comes along and opens my heart just a little more so you can see that these people are children of God with very real problems that are really trying to do the best they know how to.

 

And then someone decides to listen. Like Kedinnetse. She is honestly a hero in my eyes. This week on the phone she thanked Soeur Murray and I for coming to europe...I just said right back to her 'thank YOU for coming to Europe'. She is amazing. And yesterday in her white dress, she looked about as angelic as I've ever seen anyone look. Right before going into the baptisimal font we asked if she was ready, and then she made this little screeching noise (yes we are meant to be friends) and said "oh yes". Then after she came out, we asked her how she felt and she said "I feel good (eight million exclamation marks)". I know to you these sound like simple statements, but the emotion she used seriously made my heart swell.

 

Kedinnetse's testimony afterwards was so tender. She told a little bit about her upbringing. She grew up with an acholic dad, her mom wasn't a part of her life. She said her grandma taught her to pray, and every night she would pray that her dad would stop drinking. She grew up, had a son, and got a job as a nanny for a family. Then her boss was offered a promotion in Belgium, and asked her to move with the family for 6 months. She said when she found out she was going overseas she jumped with joy, and then realized she was going to be able to see snow for the first time. Then she came here, Ill spare you the details, but her boss's family is awful and tricked her and she now has to stay her for three years, for less pay then expected. (yes Im working on praying for charity for them). Three years away from her son. But she said she just kept praying, and God answered. And now, as she put it "I know there is a second witness of Jesus Christ, the Book of Mormon. And I know God heard my prayers."

 

Yeah...the tears were flowing pretty freely. I wish you all could have been there. I could summarize the talks and tell you how beautiful it was. But lets me honest, it would never be the same. So just trust me, "it was good".

 

And so today, Im trying to cling on to this cloud nine feeling. But I kind of feel like my fingers start to slip as I realize my time with Soeur Murray in Brussels is coming to a close, and our Kedinnetse time is ending. Now that she has an independant testimony of the restored church, its time to find others.

But luckily Belgium is a pretty rainy climate...so I figure the others can't be far off.

 

I love you all.

Soeur Smith

February 6, 2012 "Fever brain ramblings . . . bear with me!"

Bonjour Bonjour!!!

 

Well I think Im having one of those "post exam hangover effects" this pday....you know when you stressed and worry over exams and are just much to busy to get sick...then when its over your body crashes. (My family is very familiar with my post-exam sicknesses that occur every Christmas holday). Well this week was crazy busy and stressful...and today is going to be a pday of sleeping...no going out to admire old buildings or naked statues for me today. Ah well...please try and make sense of my sick-brain influenced email...here we go...

 

Like I mentioned this week was pretty crazy. We had exchanges, which normally every transfer I look forward too...but this week taking time out of our crazy scheadule to sit on trains just seemed to mess up our groove...add in a snow day when everyone cancelled on us because of a sudden snow storm...and well all of the sudden the week felt very short and we had too much to do and too little time...

 

and phew, your probably telling me to breath at this point. But that's what Sundays are for. Especially fast and testimony Sundays. Yesterday was incrediable. The heating in the chapel wasn't working and so we had sacrament meeting in the gym. It made everyone sit much closer and all of the sudden I was aware of what a big ward family we have. And as I looked around I realized how many people in this ward I have had the priviledge of getting to know and learn from. The members here are really such an example for me. And then after such a crazy and stressful week, I had one of thoses moments where I just felt like I just had way too many blessings to count and I am scum of the earth for every complaining about having to go in -12°c weather...its a priviledge to do that!

 

Then I had a flashback. Bear with me for a moment. So as a missionary I feel like people are continually asking you what made you decide to serve a mission, maybe sister missionaries get that question even more often. And I always feel like my answer seems a little funny to people. My answer is usally somewhere along the lines of "I had good experiences sharing the gospel, and wanted to do it full time". Today, Im going to expound upon that. So in 2009 (does it really feel like that long ago?) I did my internship out at Disneyworld. My goals for going- play in the parks for free as much as possible...and avoid winter. Well I got out there and found out that working at Disneyworld actually is hard work...and doesn't pay great. I debated going home. I could get paid much more and live at home for free. I remember calling mom and asking her what she thought. I told her I wasn't happy, and didn't know what to do about it. Her answer (which she probably doesnt even remember) was not what I expected. She told me to keep a gratitude journal. Wierd I know. I wasn't sure how that was going to fix my problem. But I decided to try it...I mean I would have to give Disney at least a two weeks notice anyways...might as well be grateful in the process. Well I started, and all of the sudden I noticed I had alot of blessings. And that made me want to read my scriptures and pray regularly. Then as I started to do those little things, I was happier. And when people noticed that my nametag at Disney saide BYU on it, and they would ask if I was Mormon, I felt so much more ready to share what I believed, and truly testify that this gospel is the only way to be happy in this life. One night I remember particularly, I was sitting in the kitchen with another girl from BYU, talking with our boss. It was after the park was closed, I was covered in french fry grease, we were closing up the restuarant, which meant it was probably around 1 am; when he pulled out the Book of Mormon we had given him a few weeks earlier. He asked us why we believed in this. I remember so distintly that feeling of testifying to him that his family could be together forever. That we keep the commandments so we can go to the temple and recieve that promise from our Heavenly Father. I remember him telling us, he wasn't ready to make the changes it takes to go to the temple...but that was the most beautiful promises he had ever heard of and we better do everything we can to be married in the temple.

 

Strange right? My parents, YW leaders, and seminary teachers had spent years pounding temple marriage into my head. And I always thought ya, ya ok. But when he looked at us and asked him to promise him that we would go to the temple...I just knew there was no other option for me. I also knew that I was so lucky to have that option in my life. I am just so blessed to have the gospel in my life. And suddenly, I knew in that moment, that I needed to share that option with others. I didn't know yet I would serve a mission...that would take another two years of painful decision making, but I knew that the only path I wanted to take in the life was a straight  and narrow one, and I wanted to invite as many people as I could to come with me.

 

I know your thinking, yup she definately has a fever, what does this have to do with anything. The answer is gratitude. Because of my inspired, righteous mother, I was taught the value of having a grateful attitude...that little change in attitude has led me to where I am today- and I am so glad!  This week I was reminded of the importance of that. Everything did not go as planned as this week. We had rendezvous cancelled, people disappoint us, frigid weather threaten the safety of my nose and toes, and scheadules change (I know...the horror!) but we also had miracles occur, some big, and some so little I didn't notice them until I took the time to pray and thank my Heavenly Father.

 

Im realizing in the moment I havn't told you about any of our amis this week, or any stories, and  yet all of this makes sense in my brain...but probably not when its written down. But every week when I sit down to write my email I am reminded again of how many blessings I have, and this week I wanted to share that feeling. There are many things I have yet to learn about the gospel, or how to be a good missionary, or compaion, or friend, or sister, or daughter. There is much I have to learn when it comes to speaking french. But there is one thing I do know. When I keep the commandments I am happy...and I know I am blessed.

 

And that's why I am a missionary.

 

Love you all!

Soeur Smith